Morning Meditations #43: It Must Be A Thursday

MM has suffered greatly under the new schedule. I find that by the time I would get to write, I have already been studying for hours and all that is going to be talked about is that test. Not the most helpful or interesting thing for my regular readers. A couple of you may have a GRE coming up, but by and large, I don’t hear tons of people are lining up to GRE out. I have studied intensely now for a few days, but today’s distraction, had dentist appointment this morning, got one tomorrow morning as well, derailed me. Tomorrow’s is just a check-up on the deep cleaning I had a couple of months ago, and today’s saw the placing of a permanent ceramic crown on one of my last molars. In one week I get my smile back. I have a gorgeous smile, you understand, but The Powers that are Paying say that the front, broken tooth is getting fixed. Not going to look the gift horse in the mouth. I was saying about derailment.

These two dentists’ visits have broken my morning fire and office streak. I mild irritation, as there will be one come Monday. Also, speaking of irritations, I have a major toe sprain on the old left foot of The Leg Of Perpetual Injury. I think it could be a minor fracture of a metacarpal, but only the next few days of healing will tell the truth. If the bruise stays and mobility becomes worse, then the chance of fracture goes up, as well as the probability of the hospital trip to make sure it isn’t worse. Lucky for me, I know it is isn’t a break, which is what my new yoga instructor did. I say new, my first class had been scheduled for Saturday morning. No longer. I likely couldn’t have attended either, but a fucking break, damn. I got it easy sometimes.

Now that I am limping around the dentist offices and Harps on the Fiesta Corner of Fayetteville, I have had to physically slowdown for the first time in a long time. The emotional hangover has been severe. I did get my full workout in with weight increases on three of the seven exercises I do for upper body, but it has been a day of tear dodging between my appointments and self-maintenance. All weeks I have felt like this.

Those types of weeks when, even if your week was perfect, the bad news and struggles of those closest to you would make sure that nobody felt too proud to be anybody, it has been this type of week. I got to have so much fun over the last two weekends I suppose it’s due, but feeling the struggles of several around me—Full Catastrophe Living for sure.

IMG_0686My meditation this morning ended up being short, maybe under fifteen minutes. I was with my breath and then moved to positive self talk, closing with breath again. I did use my Mala today, and while doing positive self-talk through mantra, I applied the Lovingkindess technique of breathing through my heart. Last night and this morning I also did Tibetan self-massage to my injured foot. Acupoints are lovely.

The results were not high from meditation. Short duration, plus physical pain can be a tough creek to wade through for enlightenment. I have not done well today with my sadness; I will try again tomorrow.

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